The 5 Things I’ve Been Teaching My Intern This Week That I Didn’t Know I Knew

Throughout
most of my twenties I’ve felt like everyone but me has had their shit under
control. That I was a woman with a girl’s soul. A grown-up in an adult’s body.
That my experiences were somehow less valid than the rest of the world’s
because WTF? Where is the instruction manual? Is this thing on? HELLO?

And
then, just lately, it has all sort of come together whereby I’ve realised that heck. I’m doing motherfucking FINE.  

It’s
a beautiful moment where you can look in the mirror and declare to yourself, damn gurl. You doing good. Because I am.
I like who I’m becoming and it feels delicious to say that. It’s
pretty goddamn kick-ass to be proud of who you are. Does everyone feel like
this? I hope everyone feels like this. I bet Sienna Miller has always felt like this. She seems very
well-adjusted.

This
past week I’ve begun mentoring my very first intern, and get a load of this
banana pie: she wants to know what I know. I didn’t think I knew anything! But I
know proper well loads! It’s incredible!

My
confidence in myself is growing because basically I just discovered I’m not an
idiot. 

In
sharing what I know, I’ve also figured out some more personal things that apparently
I believe quite furiously, but hadn’t realised. That’s been fun. Here are The 5
Things I’ve Been Teaching My Intern This Week That I Didn’t Know I Knew,
including, but not limited to, how many times it’s appropriate to use profanity
in an 800 word blog post. Fucky fuck shit-tard.

Ready?
Ready.

Dress For The Job You Want, Not The Job
You Have

We
can get all “It don’t matter what I wear
as long as I be good, sugartits” if you like, but that isn’t going to stop the
boss from associating a sloppy look with a sloppy attitude- even if they
themselves wear Converse. It’s human nature, and denying it only means that it’s
the other chick who gets promoted. Truth.

I
throw a jacket over my outfit most days, knowing that if I need to I can meet
clients, or head out to an event last minute. OKAY FINE. I throw a jacket on
most days because it makes me feel like a goddamn rockstar. It’s called Power
Dressing for a reason- and that reason is because a sharp silhouette and a
nipped-in waist will make you feel like Miranda Priestly meets Sir Alan Sugar.

If
you’re eyeing the boardroom, dress for it.

The Most Feminist Thing You Can Do Is
Date The Nice Boy

I
suppose I’ve thought something along these lines for a long time. Way I see it,
I work too goddamn hard to play babysitter to a boy (man?) who can’t articulate
his feelings or get to dinner on time. Oh, you “just want to keep things
casual”? Screw you.

Nice
boys remember anniversaries. Nice boys call when they say they will. Nice boys celebrate
your success.  

It’s
these same nice boys who will pick up the kids from school 3 days a week, and
load the dishwasher in the way that makes you happy, simply because they love
you. They’ll do half the housework because nice boys don’t become husbands-
they become partners. And baby? If you want to be all that you can be, you’re
gonna need an equal. Preach.

Take Three Resume Copies To Your
Interview. Always.

Because
you’ll be interviewed by two people, and those two people will oft-time be men
because more men have management positions.

Those
men will not have your CV to hand.

Have
one printed off for both of them, and then keep a copy for yourself, annotated with
the talking points you feel are relevant for the job.

Being
smart isn’t cheating.

Don’t Look For A Job- Hire A Boss

At
work right now I’m the happiest I’ve ever been, and that’s because I didn’t
look for a job- I hired a boss. I found somebody willing to invest in me, who I
knew would help me to develop my skill set. Someone I could learn from.

In my
previous job I had a boss everyone would take the piss out of when he left the
room, and there’s nothing more de-motivating than having a leader who you know is a joke.

See
also: work with the best to become the best.

Bollocks to Balance

Moderation
doesn’t exist when you’re becoming who you are. Whether it’s blogging or glass
bowing, medicine or landscape gardening, if you’re not obsessed by the thing
you spend most of your day doing, you’re wasting your precious life.

Find
your passion. Drink it up. That’s happiness.

Want to say something about this post?

- Twitter.

- Facebook.

- Email.